The kids and I went for a walk at the park this afternoon and afterwards took a detour to Starbucks. We had Dexter with us so I left the kids at the door in full view while I got my coffee. As I watched from inside I saw my daughter F getting increasingly uncomfortable and read her lips as she said, "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers." Next I watched as she started backing away from the person sitting near the door whom I could not see from where I was. I went outside and asked her what the problem was. She told me that the guy sitting there was talking to her and making her uncomfortable. So I told her and S to just come inside while I waited for my coffee.
Yes, I have taught my kids not to talk to strangers. However, I have taught them that strangers are just people like any other and not all strangers are bad but I have also been blunt with them(as my mom was with me) that there are bad people out there and you don't know who is who so its better to just firmly but politely tell the person that you aren't allowed to talk to them.
What did this particular stranger say to F? Nothing really out of the ordinary but any normal person would have seen how uncomfortable he was making this little girl and stopped. He asked her what her dog's name was(had I been there I would have told her it was alright to tell him) and after she told him she wasn't supposed to talk to strangers he continued by asking if her dog was allowed to talk to strangers or if her mom was allowed to talk to strangers and then proceeded to direct his questions to the dog.
When we all came out of Starbucks he decided he needed to tell me that I was too strict a parent by putting such a fear of strangers in my kids. I told him that my kids received far too much unwanted attention here and it had made them uncomfortable. He agreed in regards to the Chinese but said that they shouldn't have such a fear of westerners. How that makes a difference is any body's guess? I asked him if he had kids of his own which he told me turned out just fine without such fear as I was instilling in my children. I told him that he shouldn't judge others' parenting. I also told him he was an ass as I walked away with him muttering after me.
What gives a person the right to judge another's parenting? Like most people, I've judged occasionally but never stopped a person and told them openly. But for someone to tell me that I have put too much a fear of strangers into my kids is blatantly ignorant. 'Stranger Danger' is just as much a part of childhood as cuts and bruises and I don't think that teaching my kids about weirdos is a bad thing!
When my daughter was a baby I told someone, "I grew that kid for nine and a half months. I'm not going to let it get hurt after all that work." This doesn't mean that I shelter my kids but I do protect them and isn't that really my job as a mother?
What do you think?
Yes, I have taught my kids not to talk to strangers. However, I have taught them that strangers are just people like any other and not all strangers are bad but I have also been blunt with them(as my mom was with me) that there are bad people out there and you don't know who is who so its better to just firmly but politely tell the person that you aren't allowed to talk to them.
What did this particular stranger say to F? Nothing really out of the ordinary but any normal person would have seen how uncomfortable he was making this little girl and stopped. He asked her what her dog's name was(had I been there I would have told her it was alright to tell him) and after she told him she wasn't supposed to talk to strangers he continued by asking if her dog was allowed to talk to strangers or if her mom was allowed to talk to strangers and then proceeded to direct his questions to the dog.
When we all came out of Starbucks he decided he needed to tell me that I was too strict a parent by putting such a fear of strangers in my kids. I told him that my kids received far too much unwanted attention here and it had made them uncomfortable. He agreed in regards to the Chinese but said that they shouldn't have such a fear of westerners. How that makes a difference is any body's guess? I asked him if he had kids of his own which he told me turned out just fine without such fear as I was instilling in my children. I told him that he shouldn't judge others' parenting. I also told him he was an ass as I walked away with him muttering after me.
What gives a person the right to judge another's parenting? Like most people, I've judged occasionally but never stopped a person and told them openly. But for someone to tell me that I have put too much a fear of strangers into my kids is blatantly ignorant. 'Stranger Danger' is just as much a part of childhood as cuts and bruises and I don't think that teaching my kids about weirdos is a bad thing!
When my daughter was a baby I told someone, "I grew that kid for nine and a half months. I'm not going to let it get hurt after all that work." This doesn't mean that I shelter my kids but I do protect them and isn't that really my job as a mother?
What do you think?
